It's that time of year again, where everything starts getting crazy. I'm dealing with birthdays right now, the Prince's was yesterday, the Princess' in less than 2 weeks. So that means at the current point in time I have TWO six year olds. Scary. This weekend Mr. M's father and wife are visiting us in the new home for the first time, can't wait to see them. Then next week we have Halloween and lots of company on the weekend for the big birthday party. I still have no idea what I'm doing for food. Every year everyone tells me I should just have it catered because I end up spending more money anyway, but I never get organized enough to do it. It won't be as many people this year anyway, so I'm not even gonna bother thinking about.
Other than that I've been working on marketing the new business, working, working out, looking at investment properties, and trying to get more sleep. Mr. M is finally feeling better and he's getting his hand fixed. Pretty soon he'll feel 18 again ;) Or at least 28.....
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Friday, October 21, 2005
One good thing about being fat
My calves actually fill up my knee high leather boots! Woot!
Now I don't want to lose the 20 lbs.....
Now I don't want to lose the 20 lbs.....
Emotional Terrorist
It's been a long difficult year in many ways. Most of which has been dealing with Psycho Mom and the effects she has on the boys and Mr. M. As much as we wish it didn't happen, Psycho Mom still has the ability to pull emotional heartstrings. A lot of them. She knows exactly what buttons to push, when to do it, and how hard. Awhile ago Mr. M and I stumbled across a message board that pertains to the illness we believe she has. To say it was mind blowing is an understatement. Every single person who writes about the person in their life that they are dealing with, portrays what it is like dealing with Psycho Mom. Exactly.
Mr. M and I deal with things differently. We go back and forth between just ignoring everything she says and trying to set her straight on her lies. There is no way to win. There is no way to deal with any situation when it comes to the kids. She can't focus on doing what is right for them, only what will hurt Mr. M. Can you imagine having a conversation where you try to find out why your kids are playing with toy guns and killing video games at the neighbors house, and being met with things like, you are impotent, your girlfriend is ugly and I'm getting a lot of sex? This is what every conversation with her is like.
In every relationship, we often have to deal with baggage, but this is different. She effected Mr. M in so many ways, and there will be repercussions, both physical and emotional for years to come. These are the things I have to deal with:
Understanding the responses of Mr. M in regards to our new relationship. How the old relationship is transferred in his responses to our relationship. The damage sexually and emotionally that was perpetrated on Mr. M, and how to rebuild his trust and his confidence.
How to set boundaries to keep her out of my life...I signed up for a relationship with him, not her.
Scheduling--why does it have to be a constant battle?
How do we keep from having Psycho Mom be the majority of our conversations? I want to talk about other things.
How do I find peace with knowing it will never make sense?
How do I allow Mr. M to deal with things in his time and when he is ready and not my time? This is sometimes VERY difficult for me.
How can I be supportive and not bossy?
How do I stop taking on the whole mess?
How do I keep from wanting to scream at the top of my lungs when we get one of those phone calls or emails where first you feel like your brains have oozed out of your head then the anger sets in?
How can I let go?
How do you determine which of Mr. M's "issues" are his intrinsic issues and which are learned behaviors due to his involvement with Psycho Mom?
How do you make a decision as to whether to leave or stay....how do you decide if the chaos involving the ex and the kids is just too much to deal with? Thankfully, I haven't had these thoughts yet, but what happens after 5, 10, 15 years of dealing with her?
How do you set appropriate limits with the stepchildren when Psycho Mom continually undermines any efforts at disciplining them?
How do you determine when the children might be mentally ill?
How do you be a "step" when the kids are being alienated against you?
How do you explain personality disorders and mental illness to a kid without bagging on his mom...and without pussyfooting around.....
Mr. M and I deal with things differently. We go back and forth between just ignoring everything she says and trying to set her straight on her lies. There is no way to win. There is no way to deal with any situation when it comes to the kids. She can't focus on doing what is right for them, only what will hurt Mr. M. Can you imagine having a conversation where you try to find out why your kids are playing with toy guns and killing video games at the neighbors house, and being met with things like, you are impotent, your girlfriend is ugly and I'm getting a lot of sex? This is what every conversation with her is like.
In every relationship, we often have to deal with baggage, but this is different. She effected Mr. M in so many ways, and there will be repercussions, both physical and emotional for years to come. These are the things I have to deal with:
Understanding the responses of Mr. M in regards to our new relationship. How the old relationship is transferred in his responses to our relationship. The damage sexually and emotionally that was perpetrated on Mr. M, and how to rebuild his trust and his confidence.
How to set boundaries to keep her out of my life...I signed up for a relationship with him, not her.
Scheduling--why does it have to be a constant battle?
How do we keep from having Psycho Mom be the majority of our conversations? I want to talk about other things.
How do I find peace with knowing it will never make sense?
How do I allow Mr. M to deal with things in his time and when he is ready and not my time? This is sometimes VERY difficult for me.
How can I be supportive and not bossy?
How do I stop taking on the whole mess?
How do I keep from wanting to scream at the top of my lungs when we get one of those phone calls or emails where first you feel like your brains have oozed out of your head then the anger sets in?
How can I let go?
How do you determine which of Mr. M's "issues" are his intrinsic issues and which are learned behaviors due to his involvement with Psycho Mom?
How do you make a decision as to whether to leave or stay....how do you decide if the chaos involving the ex and the kids is just too much to deal with? Thankfully, I haven't had these thoughts yet, but what happens after 5, 10, 15 years of dealing with her?
How do you set appropriate limits with the stepchildren when Psycho Mom continually undermines any efforts at disciplining them?
How do you determine when the children might be mentally ill?
How do you be a "step" when the kids are being alienated against you?
How do you explain personality disorders and mental illness to a kid without bagging on his mom...and without pussyfooting around.....
Divorcing Forever
Yep, it sure seems like it. For chrissakes, woman! Are you divorced yet?!?!?! Why the foot-dragging? Inquiring minds want to know! Damn it!
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Monday, October 17, 2005
Someone has the Mondays
I feel like I have nothing to talk about, and yet we were busy all weekend! Friday night we were planning on going out, but as I looked at Mr. M's face as we left soccer practice, I realized that we both needed some rest. We stopped at Costco, spent $300, went home and created a great little dish with shrimp, crab cakes, crap dip, garlic dip, grabbed a bottle of red wine and a horrible movie and hopped in the jacuzzi. It was just what Mr. M's bruised body needed.
Saturday was the roller skating party. Yes, the Queen donned old fashioned four wheelers and we dragged the kids out onto the floor, coaching them into semi skating. The Prince was rather frustrated, but the cake and ice cream put a smile back on his face, and on the way home he asked to have his own party there. Unfortunately for him, the invitations are already in the mail. We dropped them backoff with the STBEH, and I can't remember a damn thing we did the rest of the day.
Sunday it was off to the Shenandoah Balloon Festival for wine tasting. We usually stick to very dry reds, so it was fun to try some nice whites and find a few new favorites. We loved the demonstrator for North Mountain, and were very pleasantly surprised at several of their wines, including the Spiced Holiday Wine. As Mr. M tastes it he says "this would be great for the holidays", lmao, then looks at the label, duh, that's why they call it Spiced Holiday Wine. Their Mountain Sunset Apple Blush was surprising as well. We ended up buying some great cheese, and adding some wines to our list to pickup the next time we head downtown. We missed the balloon launches, if they even did them, because it was seriously windy.
Today, I cleaned out the inside of my car and sucked up all the spider webs in the garage after working this morning.....
Saturday was the roller skating party. Yes, the Queen donned old fashioned four wheelers and we dragged the kids out onto the floor, coaching them into semi skating. The Prince was rather frustrated, but the cake and ice cream put a smile back on his face, and on the way home he asked to have his own party there. Unfortunately for him, the invitations are already in the mail. We dropped them backoff with the STBEH, and I can't remember a damn thing we did the rest of the day.
Sunday it was off to the Shenandoah Balloon Festival for wine tasting. We usually stick to very dry reds, so it was fun to try some nice whites and find a few new favorites. We loved the demonstrator for North Mountain, and were very pleasantly surprised at several of their wines, including the Spiced Holiday Wine. As Mr. M tastes it he says "this would be great for the holidays", lmao, then looks at the label, duh, that's why they call it Spiced Holiday Wine. Their Mountain Sunset Apple Blush was surprising as well. We ended up buying some great cheese, and adding some wines to our list to pickup the next time we head downtown. We missed the balloon launches, if they even did them, because it was seriously windy.
Today, I cleaned out the inside of my car and sucked up all the spider webs in the garage after working this morning.....
Saturday, October 15, 2005
Law and disorder
WTF? They didn't tell me the outcome! This is an outrage! I demand to know what the jury decided! GODDAMIT!.....
Friday, October 14, 2005
Starting Over
I didn't like this show the past couple of seasons, for no reason at all, the therapists annoyed me and the people, ugh, I couldn't take 30 seconds before I changed the channel. Well, they changed the afternoon line-up on ABC and I didn't feel like watching Jeopardy while working, so I left it on NBC, and The Starting Over House.
In case you don't know it, there are basically 5-6 women in the house and they are all trying to come to terms with some aspect of their life, such as Cancer, losing weight, being a prostitute, having a baby out of wedlock, etc. The therapists are QUITE cheesy, and come up with some seriously whacked exercises, but then they really come up with some great ones.
Today, the women with cancer (I think she's in remission now), is trying to balance her life and was given three baskets to hold. One represented her, one the world and the last others. I wasn't really thinking about the exercise until it was over. She sat and walked all day with all three baskets, the self one on her head (very hard to balance) and the others in each hand, instead of balancing by putting one or two baskets down in order to balance the self basket appropriately. There is a lesson there for all of us.
Of course, now I have to attend to Mr. M's physical problems ;) He was awesome at hockey last night, and I think he will really enjoy being involved again. And of course, if this is the thing that MAKES HIM GET HIS HAND FIXED, I'm all for it. I'm not sure which I'm more concerned about, the hand or the package, but we need to take better care of both.....
In case you don't know it, there are basically 5-6 women in the house and they are all trying to come to terms with some aspect of their life, such as Cancer, losing weight, being a prostitute, having a baby out of wedlock, etc. The therapists are QUITE cheesy, and come up with some seriously whacked exercises, but then they really come up with some great ones.
Today, the women with cancer (I think she's in remission now), is trying to balance her life and was given three baskets to hold. One represented her, one the world and the last others. I wasn't really thinking about the exercise until it was over. She sat and walked all day with all three baskets, the self one on her head (very hard to balance) and the others in each hand, instead of balancing by putting one or two baskets down in order to balance the self basket appropriately. There is a lesson there for all of us.
Of course, now I have to attend to Mr. M's physical problems ;) He was awesome at hockey last night, and I think he will really enjoy being involved again. And of course, if this is the thing that MAKES HIM GET HIS HAND FIXED, I'm all for it. I'm not sure which I'm more concerned about, the hand or the package, but we need to take better care of both.....
Physical Self-Destruction
Good grief, I ain’t young anymore... but it sure was a lot of fun.
You can’t go 3+ years without skating... not work out... get only moderate exercise at best… and then on a lark – grab your gear, roll down to the local Sportsplex, and play full-throttle, no substitution hockey for 90-minutes.
Gassed wouldn’t begin to describe how I felt after the first 15-minutes. I think I began to sweat like Meatloaf in concert while simply donning my gear. I took to the rink and yes, I still do know how to skate quite well, but it looks like I will have re-teach myself skating (effectively) backwards. Despite my lack of conditioning, there is motivation in trying to keep up with most of the players who were easily 8-10 (or so) years younger and I was probably fairly effective for the first 45-minutes, managing to score a goal on my only decent shot of the night. However, I realize that if I am going to play regularly, I have to take care of a nagging hand injury that has been lingering for years. Yes, like a moron, at some point in time a few years ago, I probably broke a bone in my hand and have been suffering with on-again/off-again pain in my shooting hand since. Painful reminders occurred all night long as I tried to take an occasional wrist-shot or slap-shot only to suffer searing pain and watch the puck duff off of my stick, if I managed to get the blade on it at all. Despite all of that – the guys I met last night said I should join the league, so I must have done well enough, assuming that they didn’t want someone to sign-up that was a guaranteed "torch" down the end boards on route to a breakaway on the goalie. ;-)
Also, I don’t have protective gear for the "package." So, inevitably – it happens. I take a slapshot that hits within mere inches of the penile region, striking me on the inner left thigh, which is now varying shades of black, purple, green, and yellow. I will treat the painful experience as a "reminder" that there is one more piece of equipment that I need if I am going to save the "equipment" I have.
When I finally catch my breath, which happened as we pulled up to the garage when we arrived home, I stripped the sweaty clothes from my body to take the final assessment of damage done with this too-much, too-soon effort of the evening:
- The horribly bruised inner left thigh.
- A baseball sized scrape/bruise on my right hip that occurred during trip-up #1.
- A baseball sized scrape/bruise on my left hip that occurred during trip-up #2.
- A scraped-up left elbow.
- A sore lower back.
- A sore left shoulder.
Everything else should painfully stiffen up by tomorrow morning. Yeah, cry me a river, puss-boy. Anyway, I eagerly await the "spectator’s" assessment of my efforts. It should be a treat. All that said, boy have I missed it. I had a great time and can’t wait to torment this body again next week.
~Mister-M
You can’t go 3+ years without skating... not work out... get only moderate exercise at best… and then on a lark – grab your gear, roll down to the local Sportsplex, and play full-throttle, no substitution hockey for 90-minutes.
Gassed wouldn’t begin to describe how I felt after the first 15-minutes. I think I began to sweat like Meatloaf in concert while simply donning my gear. I took to the rink and yes, I still do know how to skate quite well, but it looks like I will have re-teach myself skating (effectively) backwards. Despite my lack of conditioning, there is motivation in trying to keep up with most of the players who were easily 8-10 (or so) years younger and I was probably fairly effective for the first 45-minutes, managing to score a goal on my only decent shot of the night. However, I realize that if I am going to play regularly, I have to take care of a nagging hand injury that has been lingering for years. Yes, like a moron, at some point in time a few years ago, I probably broke a bone in my hand and have been suffering with on-again/off-again pain in my shooting hand since. Painful reminders occurred all night long as I tried to take an occasional wrist-shot or slap-shot only to suffer searing pain and watch the puck duff off of my stick, if I managed to get the blade on it at all. Despite all of that – the guys I met last night said I should join the league, so I must have done well enough, assuming that they didn’t want someone to sign-up that was a guaranteed "torch" down the end boards on route to a breakaway on the goalie. ;-)
Also, I don’t have protective gear for the "package." So, inevitably – it happens. I take a slapshot that hits within mere inches of the penile region, striking me on the inner left thigh, which is now varying shades of black, purple, green, and yellow. I will treat the painful experience as a "reminder" that there is one more piece of equipment that I need if I am going to save the "equipment" I have.
When I finally catch my breath, which happened as we pulled up to the garage when we arrived home, I stripped the sweaty clothes from my body to take the final assessment of damage done with this too-much, too-soon effort of the evening:
- The horribly bruised inner left thigh.
- A baseball sized scrape/bruise on my right hip that occurred during trip-up #1.
- A baseball sized scrape/bruise on my left hip that occurred during trip-up #2.
- A scraped-up left elbow.
- A sore lower back.
- A sore left shoulder.
Everything else should painfully stiffen up by tomorrow morning. Yeah, cry me a river, puss-boy. Anyway, I eagerly await the "spectator’s" assessment of my efforts. It should be a treat. All that said, boy have I missed it. I had a great time and can’t wait to torment this body again next week.
~Mister-M
Thursday, October 13, 2005
It's like watching paint dry
I'm so tired of this rain. We need it, I know we do. But I can barely get out of bed in the morning and it's way to early to be starting to deal with seasonal affective disorder. Especially since I'm not tanning now. The last 3 times I've been in the sun I've broken out in an all over body rash. I'm not sure what it's about, but I really don't feel like itching, so I'm not taking a chance. Plus like I really need to drive into the city more than I already do.
Mr. M has been sick all week. He can barely sleep during the night, and he's been keeping me up by snoring, and then waking himself up, so neither of us has gotten much rest. I feel so bad for him, but last night I had to go over to the Princess' room and turn up her radio to drown him out. I hate not having him pressed up against me while I sleep. He's the only man who's ever been able to be that close to me while sleeping without annoying the fuck out of me, and I really miss his warmth when he's not there.
Other than that, not much going on. I get to watch Mr. M play hockey tonight! Can't wait.....
Mr. M has been sick all week. He can barely sleep during the night, and he's been keeping me up by snoring, and then waking himself up, so neither of us has gotten much rest. I feel so bad for him, but last night I had to go over to the Princess' room and turn up her radio to drown him out. I hate not having him pressed up against me while I sleep. He's the only man who's ever been able to be that close to me while sleeping without annoying the fuck out of me, and I really miss his warmth when he's not there.
Other than that, not much going on. I get to watch Mr. M play hockey tonight! Can't wait.....
Saturday, October 08, 2005
You Know - She Cut Him Off The Hook...
At bedtime tonight, my sons brought up the subject of marriage with the Queen, my youngest (M2) informing me that my oldest (M1) told him that Queen said we wouldn't be marrying.
M2 is totally in love with the Queen. Tonight, he gave me his approval to marry here because, as he put it, "I love her, so you should marry her. She could be my step-mom." I told him that we can't get married until I ask her and even then, she would have to say yes. As the logic of a 4-year old would have it - comes the simple solution... "Oh, well go downstairs and ask her then. Come back up and tell us what she says." Hmmm...
At this point, M1 comes into the room from a teethbrushing. He said that the Princess told him that she talked to her mom and she said that "...you two weren't getting married." The Queen, rather defensively, denied having any such conversation with the Princess. Yeah. Anyway... M1 being the one I'd be most concerned about regarding the possibility of such a development, tells me it's okay to get married to the Queen because, as he put it...
M1: She cut him off the hook you know.
Dad: Cut who off the hook?
M1: Her husband. She cut him off the hook you know, so, you know, you can marry her. Why don't you go downstairs and ask her and come up and tell us what she says?
Dad: Your brother just said the same thing. Why are you guys pressuring me?
M1 & M2 both laugh and I do, too.
M1: Well, you know, you're going to have to stock up and stuff.
Dad: Stock up? Stock up on what? Food? Drinks?
M1: No, silly, like a wedding ring and flowers and stuff.
Dad: Ohhh... good idea, M1. Smart thinking.
M1: Yeah. Then I can call her Mommy.
Dad: (shocked) Well, I'm not sure that's the best idea, but we'll worry about that when we decide we want to get married, okay?
M1: Sure. I'd be happy if you two got married.
Dad: Thanks, M1. Time to get to sleep.
Sheesh. These kids are something else lately. Oh, and the Queen really wasn't all that defensive, either. ;-) She simply said that she hasn't had a conversation about marriage with either of them. Then, she started to shake and sweat... j/k
~Mister-M
M2 is totally in love with the Queen. Tonight, he gave me his approval to marry here because, as he put it, "I love her, so you should marry her. She could be my step-mom." I told him that we can't get married until I ask her and even then, she would have to say yes. As the logic of a 4-year old would have it - comes the simple solution... "Oh, well go downstairs and ask her then. Come back up and tell us what she says." Hmmm...
At this point, M1 comes into the room from a teethbrushing. He said that the Princess told him that she talked to her mom and she said that "...you two weren't getting married." The Queen, rather defensively, denied having any such conversation with the Princess. Yeah. Anyway... M1 being the one I'd be most concerned about regarding the possibility of such a development, tells me it's okay to get married to the Queen because, as he put it...
M1: She cut him off the hook you know.
Dad: Cut who off the hook?
M1: Her husband. She cut him off the hook you know, so, you know, you can marry her. Why don't you go downstairs and ask her and come up and tell us what she says?
Dad: Your brother just said the same thing. Why are you guys pressuring me?
M1 & M2 both laugh and I do, too.
M1: Well, you know, you're going to have to stock up and stuff.
Dad: Stock up? Stock up on what? Food? Drinks?
M1: No, silly, like a wedding ring and flowers and stuff.
Dad: Ohhh... good idea, M1. Smart thinking.
M1: Yeah. Then I can call her Mommy.
Dad: (shocked) Well, I'm not sure that's the best idea, but we'll worry about that when we decide we want to get married, okay?
M1: Sure. I'd be happy if you two got married.
Dad: Thanks, M1. Time to get to sleep.
Sheesh. These kids are something else lately. Oh, and the Queen really wasn't all that defensive, either. ;-) She simply said that she hasn't had a conversation about marriage with either of them. Then, she started to shake and sweat... j/k
~Mister-M
Another kid post
Yea, what is wrong with me? Well, some things I just can't talk about. It's hard now that Mr. M reads here, not that I want him to stop. And it's hard when so many of our friends/acquaintances read here, do we really want them to know some things? I don't want to embarrass or leak any secrets of Mr. M's ;) So, other than work right now, there are kids. Lots of them. So a question I've been asking myself for awhile is alive in my head right now.
When do you stop your kids from seeing you naked?
I can remember seeing my mother naked for my entire life. We were welcome in her room at anytime, and we usually shared one bathroom, so it just wasn't a big deal. She wasn't ashamed of her body, and we were always open about asking questions. I want to make sure my children have the same experience. However, I have a son. When I was growing up it was just girls. My only brother wasn't born until I was heading off to college, so I honestly don't know how the situation was handled.
(I deleted a whole paragraph here concerning my theory on sexuality. It's probably a whole post in and of itself.)
So, here's the thing. My son will be 6 this month and my daughter will be 7 next month. They still come in the bathroom when I'm getting out of the shower, we change in the same room when needed, etc. They have their own privacy limits when it comes to other people, like Mr. M, and ask for privacy when appropriate, as do I. I don't think them seeing me naked is an issue. But I often wonder what other people would think if they knew. My children would never mention it because it's normal to them, and that's the basis of what I wanted for them. I want them to be able to accept their bodies, not be embarrassed or freaked out when they see someone else, or have to undress for gym. I want them to be able to ask me questions about their bodies and the changes they will go through.
But hey, if they end up screwed up, ya'll can point me back to this post.....
When do you stop your kids from seeing you naked?
I can remember seeing my mother naked for my entire life. We were welcome in her room at anytime, and we usually shared one bathroom, so it just wasn't a big deal. She wasn't ashamed of her body, and we were always open about asking questions. I want to make sure my children have the same experience. However, I have a son. When I was growing up it was just girls. My only brother wasn't born until I was heading off to college, so I honestly don't know how the situation was handled.
(I deleted a whole paragraph here concerning my theory on sexuality. It's probably a whole post in and of itself.)
So, here's the thing. My son will be 6 this month and my daughter will be 7 next month. They still come in the bathroom when I'm getting out of the shower, we change in the same room when needed, etc. They have their own privacy limits when it comes to other people, like Mr. M, and ask for privacy when appropriate, as do I. I don't think them seeing me naked is an issue. But I often wonder what other people would think if they knew. My children would never mention it because it's normal to them, and that's the basis of what I wanted for them. I want them to be able to accept their bodies, not be embarrassed or freaked out when they see someone else, or have to undress for gym. I want them to be able to ask me questions about their bodies and the changes they will go through.
But hey, if they end up screwed up, ya'll can point me back to this post.....
Friday, October 07, 2005
My kids fucking rock
I love them. They are so fucking amazing, every single day. Not to bring attention to myself, but I know that no matter what else I fucked up in my life, my kids were raised right. We hear it everywhere we go. Ever since they were 2 we've had people come up to us in restaurants and comment on how well behaved they are, and how beautiful, especially my daughter. Even when they've had issues, they've handled themselves appropriately. The bully situation just proved it further, and then speaking to their teachers, just drove it home. They are both loved. My son's teacher wants "23 of him", and my daughter's teacher thinks she is a "hoot" and can't believe the things that she says. "She's so much more mature than 6!" Tonight at soccer they made me proud as well. The Prince scored 7, s.e.v.e.n. goals! Almost twice what all the other kids scored combined! And the Princess blocked a ton of goals as goalie. Everyone was cheering for them, it was so awesome. The amount of skill they have is just crazy. I don't know where they got half of their athleticism, but I'm enjoying watching.....
Oh yea, and then the STBEH pulled the Princess's tooth out while we were eating pizza, ewwwwwwwwwwww.....
Oh yea, and then the STBEH pulled the Princess's tooth out while we were eating pizza, ewwwwwwwwwwww.....
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
The interesting post! I promise
So, week before last the Princess comes home on Friday and says that this boy in her class has threatened her little brother. In case you don't know the Princess, she is very capable of dealing with these situations. Watching her in action on the playground is something to behold. She will get right in kids faces and tell them that they are being rude, inconsiderate, and mean, and she doesn't like how they are acting. She will also tell them that they are doing so to make themselves feel better and that it's not going to affect her. She's good, very good. Nine out of ten kids apologize and then ask her to play with them. So, she tells this little boy the same thing, and that she is there to protect her little brother, so he should be aware that not only will she physically defend him, she will tell every adult nearby including the teacher and her (proud) mom. (Meanwhile, Prince is standing by me as she tells me this story and says: "Mom, don't worry, I can run way faster than he can." And trust me, he can.)
So, she tells the teacher, and the teacher says, "thanks for telling me but I can't do anything until he actually does something to your brother." Um WHAT THE FUCK? have we learned NOTHING from Columbine? So the Princess tells her, "well that will be too late." Can you give me a big fat DUHHHHHHHHHH. I died laughing when she told me this because SHE'S SIX, and smarter than her fucking teacher. So, Queen says, okay, we have parent teacher conferences coming up, we'll see what happens.
Well, the Princess decides she's not waiting around. So what does she do? (I just found this out and DIED, she's so very good.) She does her best little "lady" routine and asks the boy for his PHONE NUMBER! And he gives it to her. LMFAO. She comes home and says she is going to "call his parents and tell them how he is acting and threatening people." Daddy tells her not to do that.
So, this week, little boy who is going to get fucked up if he does anything, threatens the Prince again. This time, it's taken seriously, and the Principal speaks to all parties involved. The little boy tries to spin a story that the Prince threatened him, which no one believes luckily. Tomorrow we have the conferences, so this should be interesting as the STBEH is all fired up with his speech, lmao.....
So, she tells the teacher, and the teacher says, "thanks for telling me but I can't do anything until he actually does something to your brother." Um WHAT THE FUCK? have we learned NOTHING from Columbine? So the Princess tells her, "well that will be too late." Can you give me a big fat DUHHHHHHHHHH. I died laughing when she told me this because SHE'S SIX, and smarter than her fucking teacher. So, Queen says, okay, we have parent teacher conferences coming up, we'll see what happens.
Well, the Princess decides she's not waiting around. So what does she do? (I just found this out and DIED, she's so very good.) She does her best little "lady" routine and asks the boy for his PHONE NUMBER! And he gives it to her. LMFAO. She comes home and says she is going to "call his parents and tell them how he is acting and threatening people." Daddy tells her not to do that.
So, this week, little boy who is going to get fucked up if he does anything, threatens the Prince again. This time, it's taken seriously, and the Principal speaks to all parties involved. The little boy tries to spin a story that the Prince threatened him, which no one believes luckily. Tomorrow we have the conferences, so this should be interesting as the STBEH is all fired up with his speech, lmao.....
Monday, October 03, 2005
Life is going way too fucking fast
The weekend flew by, got the Prince and Princess back, resumed the school week schedule and I feel swamped. Two additional new clients this week, plus another 7 hr day in the car for a dentist appointment.
I'm having invisalign done, and everyone keeps asking me why. Including the dentist. My bottom teeth are perfect except for one tooth, that no one can see, but would only take 3 regular braces to fix. The top there is spacing which I don't like, though no one else says it bothers them (yea right, they are just too nice.) So, I priced it down here and in my hometown, and the difference? Two thousand dollars. I am willing to make the drive and arrange my visits to family around the minimal dentist visits, in order to save that money. I'm cheap.
Then back for the end of the week for teacher conferences for both kids, soccer practice and Mr. M picking up the boys for the weekend. Next week - NOTHING. I said that last week and then this week exploded, so we'll see how long that lasts. I need to get the kids birthday party plans together, I've done nothing. Plus I need to get Halloween stuff, the Princess is a Snow Princess, adorable, and the Prince wants to be the "Thing", yea, probably not gonna happen, so I gotta find something else for him. He said as long as it's cool he doesn't care, lol.
Right now, I'm sitting here with deep conditioner in my hair, an enzyme treatment on my face, and out of breath from playing soccer with the kids.....
Oh yea, comments are hidden right now cuz I'm tired of fucking spammers. And I swear to God I will post something interesting this week.....
I'm having invisalign done, and everyone keeps asking me why. Including the dentist. My bottom teeth are perfect except for one tooth, that no one can see, but would only take 3 regular braces to fix. The top there is spacing which I don't like, though no one else says it bothers them (yea right, they are just too nice.) So, I priced it down here and in my hometown, and the difference? Two thousand dollars. I am willing to make the drive and arrange my visits to family around the minimal dentist visits, in order to save that money. I'm cheap.
Then back for the end of the week for teacher conferences for both kids, soccer practice and Mr. M picking up the boys for the weekend. Next week - NOTHING. I said that last week and then this week exploded, so we'll see how long that lasts. I need to get the kids birthday party plans together, I've done nothing. Plus I need to get Halloween stuff, the Princess is a Snow Princess, adorable, and the Prince wants to be the "Thing", yea, probably not gonna happen, so I gotta find something else for him. He said as long as it's cool he doesn't care, lol.
Right now, I'm sitting here with deep conditioner in my hair, an enzyme treatment on my face, and out of breath from playing soccer with the kids.....
Oh yea, comments are hidden right now cuz I'm tired of fucking spammers. And I swear to God I will post something interesting this week.....
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Saying a lot and feeling like you said nothing...
That's the only way to describe the sessions of the last two days with the custody evaluator. It matters not that I spent about 5 hours talking. It matters not all of the things, events, situations, and experiences that I did cover from the last 10-years. There is so much to recount, so much you want to tell, so many concerns that we have - that you'll always leave saying "DAMN! I forgot to say [this]!"
After my 3-hour talkfest on Friday, we walked to the car and I turned to the Queen and said, "I feel like I said nothing." She didn't quite understand what I was feeling until her roughly 60-minute discussion on Saturday. She walked out into the yard when she was finished understanding just what I was talking about the previous day. It's that feeling that, while you told as many stories as you could cram into your time with the evaluator, you leave feeling like you left out something *just a little bit more important* than anything else you said.
I brought just about every last stitch of documentation that I had amassed over the course of the last 5-years. In binders, folders, report covers... all organized and just about everything with summaries. Her abusive behaviors, her discussions about suicide, the times where she saw fit to document not being able to handle the children on her own, her sister with the mental illness, vicious fights between the two of them (remember, PsychoSIL is spending A LOT of time there helping Psycho Ex manage the boys). Transcribed telephone calls, including the phone threats from PsychoSIL and PsychoFIL. Everything.
I made a plea to the evaluator. I asked her, "If you do nothing else for me during this entire process, I beg of you to carefully go through all of this documentation. It will show you a consistent, ongoing pattern of abuse, harrassment, and inability to cope with real life over the course of 5-years. It will do a far better job of showing you what she is like than I could ever tell you because it is all in her own words. She is going to show you better than I can tell you." I told her that both days. I reminded her that this is just the stuff that Psycho Ex saw fit to document to me. It doesn't account for phone discussions, face-to-face discussions, experiences with her family that simply aren't documented. I said that to put in perspective that, for as much as I have for the evaluator to read & review - it's only a small portion of the whole story and to be sure to consider that, too. For what it's worth, she said she will. She explained that she is very "in tune" to mental illness issues, that she treats many people with BPD, and that she will take me concerns very, very seriously.
Let's hope. Psycho Ex goes second and I don't know for when that is scheduled. She's made a lot of overtures about having "surprises" for me, but I've poured over my history with her with a fine tooth comb and have been unable to come up with anything. Even police reports she alleges to have can't possibly exist because if she called the police when she tells me she said she did... AND if she reported what she said she had - I'd have spent time in jail, which I have never done.
One sad reality, regardless the outcome - the children will have trouble adjusting no matter the outcome. Worse, though... is if I don't win this and that fucked-up family raises my kids, they simply will not turn out as I had dreamed. That's tough to live with.
~Mister-M
After my 3-hour talkfest on Friday, we walked to the car and I turned to the Queen and said, "I feel like I said nothing." She didn't quite understand what I was feeling until her roughly 60-minute discussion on Saturday. She walked out into the yard when she was finished understanding just what I was talking about the previous day. It's that feeling that, while you told as many stories as you could cram into your time with the evaluator, you leave feeling like you left out something *just a little bit more important* than anything else you said.
I brought just about every last stitch of documentation that I had amassed over the course of the last 5-years. In binders, folders, report covers... all organized and just about everything with summaries. Her abusive behaviors, her discussions about suicide, the times where she saw fit to document not being able to handle the children on her own, her sister with the mental illness, vicious fights between the two of them (remember, PsychoSIL is spending A LOT of time there helping Psycho Ex manage the boys). Transcribed telephone calls, including the phone threats from PsychoSIL and PsychoFIL. Everything.
I made a plea to the evaluator. I asked her, "If you do nothing else for me during this entire process, I beg of you to carefully go through all of this documentation. It will show you a consistent, ongoing pattern of abuse, harrassment, and inability to cope with real life over the course of 5-years. It will do a far better job of showing you what she is like than I could ever tell you because it is all in her own words. She is going to show you better than I can tell you." I told her that both days. I reminded her that this is just the stuff that Psycho Ex saw fit to document to me. It doesn't account for phone discussions, face-to-face discussions, experiences with her family that simply aren't documented. I said that to put in perspective that, for as much as I have for the evaluator to read & review - it's only a small portion of the whole story and to be sure to consider that, too. For what it's worth, she said she will. She explained that she is very "in tune" to mental illness issues, that she treats many people with BPD, and that she will take me concerns very, very seriously.
Let's hope. Psycho Ex goes second and I don't know for when that is scheduled. She's made a lot of overtures about having "surprises" for me, but I've poured over my history with her with a fine tooth comb and have been unable to come up with anything. Even police reports she alleges to have can't possibly exist because if she called the police when she tells me she said she did... AND if she reported what she said she had - I'd have spent time in jail, which I have never done.
One sad reality, regardless the outcome - the children will have trouble adjusting no matter the outcome. Worse, though... is if I don't win this and that fucked-up family raises my kids, they simply will not turn out as I had dreamed. That's tough to live with.
~Mister-M
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